Great Days come on Mondays.

Today was a great day. There is something sweetly satisfying about winning the unwinnable. It's kind of like seeing you ex that cheated on you miserable with the person they chose over you... or like ... winning a grain truck over-weight case.

So, here friends in IL... is the trick.

The state's attorney.. he was a prick.

I walked right in.

Said I made you copies. Here they are highlighted.
Yes, my shirt is pink.
Yes, you are wearing a brown suit. And a black belt.. and white socks.

There is a fake lady bug flying around the light in my house. One of the lights on the fan with four lights is dead.

If these were real lady bugs- every day would be lucky.

today wasn't entirely lucky. I wiped chicken poop onto the carpet.. and cleaned all day. my files are a disaster.

I have things to upload in my mind. To process. The what's of what I really want
the hows of how it will happen.

And they whys... should that be spelled w.h.i.e.s? I think yes. It is a new word.

W.h.i.e.s I think I could make that a really good acronym. One of those things you'd learn at a bad training for women seminar... where women empower each other with little sayings... and make signals to each other. And it would be something about living wise... and exploring the w.h.i.e.s. Women. Have Ideas.to Empower Self. or some stupid something.

PINK BATHROBES AFTER COURT. Yes, that was what I was talking about.

No matter how prepared I am, there is an insecurity that creeps over my confidence. Like a beautiful girl with a nice body that gets a boob job. Or a guy that puts fake protein in his smoothie in the morning just to make his chest look like he has heart disease. Speaking of, what happened to tits-mcgee... the guy who chose the human rights program in costa rica because of the gym by the court... wow.

Like the way I don't know who I even am when I step into that room.

Today I faked it. I acted like I didn't know I didn't know. I walked up-- gave the judge the motion... and after she signed it and granted it I said, "can I ask you a question?" with a smile on my face. "did the defendant need to be here even if the argument was not based on testimony and was all argument of facts as written on the ticket and statutory law?" she looked shocked

"yes, the defendant would have needed to be here, after all, it was a trial date."

"Thanks."

"You are welcome, you did a fine job."

Ahh.. sigh..
regardless, it leaves me here... in my pink bathrobe after a bath.. and watching an episode of Bones. Wishing I was 25.








I've told this to people a million times.

Every time I went to court in CA, I would come home, put on my pink bathrobe, regardless of the temperature, take a hot bath, and cry while eating granola with fresh berries and half and half.

It's like a break up almost. The feeling in your gut, the waking up early. The reading conversations in your mind. Working it over how to say it right.... "i'm just not feeling like I can commit to this right now, your honor, please see exhibit a, not the highlighted portion, I can't say that I want to be with you forever, or even right now, I love you... notice that the statute reads a 20% variance. Well 20% of 20,000 is 4000 pounds, Your Honor, you will not .. no not you will note.. please notice... no, don't.
please take note.. no, SECTION e reads.. presumably because legislature wanted to.. no, I do love you I didn't mean that I didn't... I just meant, that I don't know who I am or what I am saying or why it is important...

dismissed.


Thinking about what you are going to say to a judge is like this for me... leaving me so exhausted that I MUST wear my pink bathrobe.



I don't know when the last time I washed it is.