Thank you for giving to the cause.

Have you ever wanted to write a letter to someone thanking her/him for doing something horrible? I remember when Adam cheated on me with Ashley. During a very sad time in my life when I needed someone—after I dated him far longer than I wanted to. I stuck it out with him for his feelings… and then, right then, at my most vulnerable point—he did all that. I wallowed in self-pity for some time. Thinking why would he do that to me? Why would she be so horrible. I remember the day I got over it. I wrote her a thank you note. I was so happy to be liberated. Or Josh and Nilmini (however you spell it). I soon watched these relationships crash and burn and I healed those small chips in my heart that were not so broken in the first place. I did write them thank you notes. At varying times months to years later. I remember how upset Adam was with me that I had sent that note to Ashley. He tried to call me and talk to me about why I could not contact his current girlfriend. I told him that I could—as was evidenced by the fact that I did. Don’t tell me what I can and cannot do especially when what you told me I cannot do: I just did.

If I had the where-with-all to write you a letter to your Facebook message inbox, it would look like this.


To Whom It May Concern:

I know that this is the last thing you expect from me. I know that you probably think that I think you are not an amazing person. I want to thank you. This is not to say that I think you are smart, or that I would ever respect you. I just want you to know that I love you for what you did to yourself and did for me. You enabled me.

Thank you.

Thank you for screwing up your own life to further mine. Because you so selfishly thought you were doing what was right for you. You made what is so totally right for me possible. I hope you are happy that you could make all of this possible. I think if I were ever to meet you face to face at a farmer’s market, I would hug you. Would that be weird? Then I wouldn’t—if you wouldn’t like it. I would not hug you. But I want to. Because it is all thanks to you. Thanks to you. Cheers let’s raise our glasses and drink a little Dom Perignon. Cheers to you. In fact, I’ll let you have the whole bottle. I’ll drink some grape juice with a scoop of ice cream. I love that treat for a special occasion.

I’m not sure what you were thinking. Maybe you had a lapse of thought—a short moment when you lost all consciousness and it manifested itself in a series of bad ideas that were made physical actions. I don’t care, but, I would like to know what you were thinking. Probably not thinking soundly-- no, most likely not thinking soundly. This is why, as mentioned before, I don’t think you are smart, nor do I respect you… but I like you. You have done more for me than I would have known to do for myself.


I suppose this could go on and on. But, I think you get the gist.
I would be remiss if I did not tell you thank you.

I hope you get everything you work towards, you deserve it.

Ashley